Chapter 1: Section 3: Page 24: Line 46-47 (331-332)

 "That was . . . well executed, Blundell. How did you know where that card was?"

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Some people need ellipses to give compliments and other people are not me and Lindsay. There's something inside me that causes me to feel that giving a compliment is a zero sum game in which I'm losing a piece of myself every time. It's probably why I'm so afraid of being earnest. When I ran a warehouse on the Netscape campus back in the 90s, I would sometimes play Pink Floyd's The Wall and just weep amid the racks.

Ha ha! No I didn't! I can't believe you believed that! So gullible! I actually used to listen to that album and mutter, "Pussy." Then I'd shotgun a whisky and do fifty push-ups while thinking about all the ladies with whom I'd had sex and nobody ever walked into the warehouse calling my name wondering why it was taking me so long to emerge from deep within the warehouse and why my face was wet. It was from the sweat of doing so many push-ups!

Anyway, I wish I were better at complimenting people! I suppose I would have complimented Miles in this case because, personally, it would cost me nothing. "Good job making ten dollars off of that man afraid that you were going to pull the whole systemically racist architecture of America down on top of his head!" I would have shouted while patting him fraternally on the back.

Chapter 1: Section 3: Page 24: Line 45 (330)

 A surprised expression could be noted on Lindsay's face.

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Some of my friends were once writing a story together in a round-robin style. Another friend of mine asked if they could read it and the friend she was talking to said, "Sure but don't show it to Grunion Guy." After he sent it to her, she immediately showed it to me, Grunion Guy. It was not great. I bring it up because when a person in a story becomes surprised, the author best notes it the way Pynchon did and not the way my friends' did. Their version of this line would have been, "Surprise came across Lindsay's face." Reading that line in the diner with some friends sent us all into hysterical laughter, especially when my friend Upright, acting as the character Surprise, mimed it by pretending to jerk himself off and then throwing his ejaculate across the table and into my face while yelling, "Bleeeeah!"

No, no! Don't go! I'll have some serious intellectual criticism and insights into Against the Day in my next post! I'm sure of it!

Chapter 1: Section 3: Page 24: Line 44 (329)

 "Oh, that is . . ." Lindsay began tentatively, but Miles had already pocketed the offering, amiably calling out, "Evening, sir," as they strolled away.

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The naïve and credulous part of me that wants to believe the best in people (which the Non-Certified Spouse is always chastising me for) and also the part of me that is fairly better than average at the comprehension of literature thinks Lindsay was about to politely decline the offer of money, seeing as how there was no harm done and a bit uncomfortable about the racial implications of the entire encounter. This is almost certainly the case because Lindsay begins "tentatively," as if he's uncomfortable with the transaction and the implication that these boys might be angry enough to get this man beaten or arrested.

But there's also the cynical side of me that can't stand Lindsay and is ready to portray him as nothing more than an exaggerated elementary school hall monitor whose power has gone to his head. That side of me wants to believe Lindsay was about to severely scold this man for not only trying to con them but also thinking they would take his unlawful bribe to keep quiet about his scam. "Oh, that is beyond the pale, my good man, thinking that we would turn our eyes away from your demeritorious behavior by accepting your monetary offering?!" I mean, I want to believe this but I'm too good a reader to simply pretend something in the text is the way I want it to be and then delude myself into actually believing it and then to crusade for my reading of the text to be the only true way to read it, thus demanding millions of people denounce the author for my misinterpretation.

Sorry. I couldn't help slipping some of my commentary on "Tumblr deconstructionism" into this post!

Chapter 1: Section 3: Page 24: Line 42-43 (327-328)

 "Lord have mercy, last time that happened I ended up in the Cook County jail for a nice long vacation. A tribute to your sharp eyes, young man, and no hard feelings," holding out a ten-dollar banknote.

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Pynchon sometimes leaves out pertinent detail because he's so mired in the subtext of what he's writing so it's possible that Miles bet on the game. But I don't think so. I'm sure the man is simply offering Miles ten bucks so that Miles doesn't call the cops on what is obviously a scam and not an African divinatory ritual at all. That seems pretty self-explanatory but what else am I going to write about?! A five paragraph digression on how Cook's Country and/or America's Test Kitchen (were these two different shows? The same show? What was going on here?!) were never the same once Christopher "Slenderman" Kimball left to do his own cooking show (which wasn't worth watching either. They truly needed each other)?

Some people might be thinking, "Why would you discuss that PBS show? The guy mentioned 'Cook County', not 'Cook's Country'?" And I can only answer that by mentioning this: when I was doing Lyle's Study Guide for the Literal Interpretation of The Bible for Dumb-Dumbs, I wrote extensively about the television show Lost simply because J.J. Abrams wrote and produced Lost and there was a character in Genesis named Abram.

I suppose I could also write about race relations in America and point out how subservient, apologetic, and polite this man feels he needs to be to a teenaged white boy in an effort to avoid violence and persecution from law enforcement. This Black man points out that for running this game that probably just gets white con men's tables kicked over and then chased away from the neighborhood, he wound up in jail for a long stretch. Then he compliments the kid who could get him in some serious trouble, apologizes ("no hard feelings" is an apology, right?), and then offers him some hush money. A white guy in this situation would probably have just laughed and/or sneered at Miles and told him to get lost.

I've found that people who think minorities expect certain entitlements in our country are already taking for granted those entitlements themselves. Having spent a lot of time in 7-Eleven stores late at night for "business reasons", here's a race-based observation I've made that probably explains what I mean and can probably be expounded upon: white people will come in and ask about day old doughnuts and if they can have them for free while Black people will come in and ask about day old doughnuts at a discount.

People who deny there are two different Americas (at least two!) depending on your race simply aren't observing the world. Their eyes are turned inward, and they just don't care to spend any brain power thinking about anything that doesn't involve and/or benefit themselves. They think people speaking up about systemic bias and oppression are causing trouble because they can't see how the status quo causes so much trouble for people not like them.

But seriously, Christopher Kimball was totally Slenderman, right?